Saturday, June 19, 2010

Sanni Kaita

This piece of writing is so funny and so so creative that i had to share it with my fellow Nigeri-ans and the rest of the world again and again without permission from the author because i don't even know him.. i added my piece to it though to make it less kai-ta-s-tro-phic

KAITA (Kai-ta)
v. Kai*ta, Kai*tas, kai*ta'ed, kai*ta'ing

1. To single-handedly dash the hopes and aspirations of one's nation in the full glare of other nations
2. To karate-kick your way out of the greatest stage/spotlight ever known to man
3. To destroy/zap/siphon the energies of team mates plus 140 million people through unexplainable stupidity
4. To act foolishly, unintelligently or irrationally and IMMEDIATELY regret the action by falling on your knees

(Etymology: Derived from the dreadful match between Nigeria and lowly Greece at the 2010 Soccer World Cup)

Usage:

"Please, please, do not KAITA what we have been building for 50 years o! Oloshi!"

"I don't care what people say, I will KAITA the multi-billion dollar plan!"

"That man, you know, the hopeless, useless, visionless, KAITAing guy!"

"I was KAITAing until I met Jesus!"


Synonyms:

1. Sabotage
2. Incapacitate
3. Destroy/Demobilize
4. Jeopardize
5. Impair
6. Implode
7. Shege Banza!

OTHER MEANINGS AND DERIVATIVES

KAITA (Kai-ta)
n. Kai*ta

A term that describes a temporary but kaitastrophic loss of mental competency and faculty.
See also Instant Amnesia.
(Source: davidylan)


KAITAISIS (Kai-ta-i-sis)
n. Kai*ta*i*sis

1. A new mental sickness recently discovered by Neurosurgeons. It affects the victim's ability to think right or make right judgement especially when it matters most.

2. Victims often confuse the game of soccer for a karate session. Its derived from the new word KAITA
(Source: tlops)


KAITARIZATION (Kai-ta-ri-za-tion)
n. Kai*ta*ri*za*shen

Kaitarization is the act of being turned into a useless mongol OR a Shaolin Temple soccer player.
(Source: chichi234 & colomb)


KAITA-KAITA (Kai-ta-kai-ta)
n. Kai*ta*kai*ta

Kaita-Kaita means unprecedented confusion and unimaginable pandemonium
Usage: "Kaita-kaita don burst!"
(Source: lizzybabe1)


KAITA (Kai-ta)
n. Kai*ta

A highly explosive bomb needed more in Iraq than in Nigeria
Usage: "Allied Forces just dropped the K-Bomb! Yes! The Kaita! Ladies and gentlemen, the war is over!!!"
(Source: ActiveMan)


KAITARACT (Kai-ta-ra-ct)
n. Kai*ta*ra*kt

A one-of-a-kind eye defect that makes a soccer player see another player as a Jabulani Ball to be kicked
Usage: "Pity, he suffered from a sudden chronic case of Kaitaract"
(Source: we_lycans)

KAITASTROPPHY (Kai-ta-stro-phy)

A sudden irrational outburst that can not be attributed to any rational reason commonly found in cows in the nothern part of Nigeria which normally leads to disruption of the effort of others, and total destruction of a team or herd. An if a Kaita suffer and attack from the syndrome In a football match. it could lead to loosing a chance at the trophy
(Source: babaolowo)


I need more interesting definitions of the Kaita phenomenon.. help me guys

Tuesday, June 15, 2010

Technology for safer roads

A multidisciplinary research group formed by experts of the Universitat Jaume I (UJI), the Universidad Politécnica de Valencia (UPV) and the University of Valencia (UV) and coordinated by the Robotics and Information and Communication Technologies Institute (IRTIC) of the UV has developed a new system for traffic management which will reduce the index of accidents in adverse meteorological conditions. This system has been developed within the Meteosafety Project, and has been funded by the Centre for Studies and Experimentation of Public Works of the Ministry of Public Works with more than 50.000€. The aim of the project is to get more intelligent roads to avoid accidents, thanks to the incorporation, for the first time, of meteorological variables, together with data on the state of the traffic and the conditions of the road. On the part of the UJI, the project counts with the participation of the researchers Luis Amable García Fernández and Vicente Ramón Tomás López of the Department of Computer Science and Engineering.

Putting into practice Meteosafety, which has been developed during a period of two years, in the traffic management systems “will be able to reduce between 5 and 10% traffic accidents caused or aggravated by the meteorological conditions”, has pointed out Juan José Martínez, researcher coordinator of Meteosafety. Research groups of the Universitat Politècnica de Catalunya and the company INDRA have also taken part in the project. Although the system is in a prototype stage, “its incorporation will be very fast and will be able to start to work by the end of 2011, due to the fact it is based on already working technology”, says the researcher.

The development of Meteosafety allows optimizing the data given by the weather stations and detectors installed on the roads, both state and regional owned. In this way, it will help to prevent accidents, and also improve the traffic conditions. This project “implements two levels of intelligence: roadside, notice boards can warn in advance about adverse meteorology. Then the data are sent, in real time, to the Traffic Management centres of the various administrations, where a system suggests the actions to be taken to reduce the consequences of the atmospheric phenomenon on the road network”, says the researcher Arturo Sáez.

Meteosafety is based on already existing technologies and equipments, as for example the standard of the Universal Remote Stations (ERU), the RDS-TMC diffusion or the channel of traffic messages. Even though, in the future, it could be incorporated to the kind of communication technologies known as infrastructure-vehicle, it is to say, that the very same road will inform the car or commercial and public transport drivers about the state of the roads as a whole: weather, road conditions and state of traffic.