Saturday, June 19, 2010

Sanni Kaita

This piece of writing is so funny and so so creative that i had to share it with my fellow Nigeri-ans and the rest of the world again and again without permission from the author because i don't even know him.. i added my piece to it though to make it less kai-ta-s-tro-phic

KAITA (Kai-ta)
v. Kai*ta, Kai*tas, kai*ta'ed, kai*ta'ing

1. To single-handedly dash the hopes and aspirations of one's nation in the full glare of other nations
2. To karate-kick your way out of the greatest stage/spotlight ever known to man
3. To destroy/zap/siphon the energies of team mates plus 140 million people through unexplainable stupidity
4. To act foolishly, unintelligently or irrationally and IMMEDIATELY regret the action by falling on your knees

(Etymology: Derived from the dreadful match between Nigeria and lowly Greece at the 2010 Soccer World Cup)

Usage:

"Please, please, do not KAITA what we have been building for 50 years o! Oloshi!"

"I don't care what people say, I will KAITA the multi-billion dollar plan!"

"That man, you know, the hopeless, useless, visionless, KAITAing guy!"

"I was KAITAing until I met Jesus!"


Synonyms:

1. Sabotage
2. Incapacitate
3. Destroy/Demobilize
4. Jeopardize
5. Impair
6. Implode
7. Shege Banza!

OTHER MEANINGS AND DERIVATIVES

KAITA (Kai-ta)
n. Kai*ta

A term that describes a temporary but kaitastrophic loss of mental competency and faculty.
See also Instant Amnesia.
(Source: davidylan)


KAITAISIS (Kai-ta-i-sis)
n. Kai*ta*i*sis

1. A new mental sickness recently discovered by Neurosurgeons. It affects the victim's ability to think right or make right judgement especially when it matters most.

2. Victims often confuse the game of soccer for a karate session. Its derived from the new word KAITA
(Source: tlops)


KAITARIZATION (Kai-ta-ri-za-tion)
n. Kai*ta*ri*za*shen

Kaitarization is the act of being turned into a useless mongol OR a Shaolin Temple soccer player.
(Source: chichi234 & colomb)


KAITA-KAITA (Kai-ta-kai-ta)
n. Kai*ta*kai*ta

Kaita-Kaita means unprecedented confusion and unimaginable pandemonium
Usage: "Kaita-kaita don burst!"
(Source: lizzybabe1)


KAITA (Kai-ta)
n. Kai*ta

A highly explosive bomb needed more in Iraq than in Nigeria
Usage: "Allied Forces just dropped the K-Bomb! Yes! The Kaita! Ladies and gentlemen, the war is over!!!"
(Source: ActiveMan)


KAITARACT (Kai-ta-ra-ct)
n. Kai*ta*ra*kt

A one-of-a-kind eye defect that makes a soccer player see another player as a Jabulani Ball to be kicked
Usage: "Pity, he suffered from a sudden chronic case of Kaitaract"
(Source: we_lycans)

KAITASTROPPHY (Kai-ta-stro-phy)

A sudden irrational outburst that can not be attributed to any rational reason commonly found in cows in the nothern part of Nigeria which normally leads to disruption of the effort of others, and total destruction of a team or herd. An if a Kaita suffer and attack from the syndrome In a football match. it could lead to loosing a chance at the trophy
(Source: babaolowo)


I need more interesting definitions of the Kaita phenomenon.. help me guys

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